Are you rewarding your dog's attention seeking?

Dogs seek our attention for many reasons, we have to remember that their lives are largely dictated by us and our routines. We control much of what happens during their day, so naturally they will seek us out to fulfil their needs.

Attention seeking is a normal behaviour, and most the time it’s not problematic, your dog might pester you for their meals, a walk, or some fuss, but it remains manageable. However, for some dogs it can become excessive and problematic.

• Constant begging for attention, including with pawing, whining or barking.

• Stealing or destroying things to gain attention.

• Mouthing, play-biting or jumping.

• Bringing toys to be thrown repeatedly.

Trying to ignore these behaviours rarely works because dogs will learn to escalate the behaviour in a way that can’t be ignored! You might be able to ignore the occasional whine or nudge, but can you ignore prolonged barking or play-biting? Probably not!

The goal is not to ignore their demands for attention, but instead to teach alternative behaviours and ensure their needs are met in a way that reduces the occurrence of attention seeking.

Common Ways Attention Seeking is Accidently Reinforced

• Responding to every demand (e.g. fussing them when your dog paws or nudges you).

• Talking or making eye contact when your dog barks or whines at you.

• Pushing your dog away or saying "no" – attention is still attention!

• Giving chews or toys to distract your dog, and accidently reinforcing the behaviour

• Attempting to ignore the behaviour and then snapping when it gets too much … your dog has now learnt to escalate their behaviour to get a reaction.

Why This Reinforcement Becomes a Problem

Dogs quickly learn what works and even negative attention can be rewarding, so while you may understand that you’re saying "NO" to your dogs’ unwanted barking, your dog is only thinking they’ve successfully gained your attention.

Reinforced behaviours become stronger and more frequent, so attempting to ignore until it becomes impossible, means your dog gains reinforcement (in the form of your attention) for the most intolerable behaviours. Some attention seeking behaviours are intrinsically reinforcing too, so no matter how much you ignore them, your dog could still be finding it highly reinforcing.

Attention seeking is, without doubt, a frustrating behaviour problem to deal with. It’s understandable that most people attempt to distract their dog or give in to their demands simply to stop the behaviour.

It can also feel incredibly frustrating for the dog, especially if they are used to receiving attention for certain behaviours and then this stops. It can cause increased stress and frustration, which leads to more attention seeking as the dog attempts to relieve their stress and release frustration.

How to Improve Attention-Seeking Behaviour

Improving attention-seeking begins with looking at the bigger picture. It’s not all about the specific problem behaviour, it’s also about WHY your dog is displaying this behaviour.

• Are they feeling anxious or stressed and seeking relief from this?

• Are they bored or lacking in mental or physical stimulation?

• Are they tired and unable to regulate their sleep properly?

• Are their needs for social interactions being met?

For many dogs, they will be receiving sufficient exercise, stimulation, and interaction, yet attention seeking persists. It’s not always a case of ‘bored dog’.

Often, the opposite is actually the problem. A dog who is overtired, overstimulated, and unable to rest properly can be most prone to attention seeking behaviours. In this state, many dogs struggle to think calmly or make good decisions, and especially in puppyhood and adolescence, this can lead to increased attempts to gain attention.

Dogs may also feel stressed if routines change and this increased stress can cause behaviours aimed at relieving stress. For example, moving house or changing job can create a significant change for your dog and this may be where you start to see them attempting to gain more attention or trying out new behaviours, like barking at you or stealing things.

Strategies to Stop Attention Seeking

By understanding WHY your dog may be attention seeking, you can adjust their environment and routine to reduce trigger points, such as:

• Create a quiet, safe place for them to sleep, like a quiet room or crate. Encourage them to rest regularly in this space to ensure they have restorative sleep time several times a day.

• Tackle any underlying anxiety or stress (seek professional help).

• Offer chews or enrichment activities during the day but aim to give these BEFORE your dog has started looking for your attention.

• Manage their environment to reduce opportunities for attention seeking, such as removing stealable items, using baby gates to block off problem areas, and providing them with a safe space to relax in.

• Build in quality time and engage in activities and attention before they start to demand it.

• Teach impulse control and alternative behaviours, such as bed settles, relaxed behaviours, and sitting calmly for fuss.

Check out our other blog for more tips on teaching your dog to settle: https://www.houndspot.com/post/5-secrets-to-a-settled-dog

Be Consistent

Make sure everyone in the household is following the same rules and being consistent. Mixed messages add stress and confusion for our dogs, and this can increase attention seeking behaviours further.

Consistent routines can be helpful so your dog has more predictability in their day, you can vary the exact time of activities happening but try to maintain some predictable routines, such as mealtimes, walks and play time. This can help reduce your dog feeling the need to pester for activities, instead learning to wait patiently.

When to Seek Professional Help

If behaviours are escalating despite trying strategies to improve it, seeking professional help can be a game-changer. There may be subtle adjustments which will make a huge difference to your dog’s behaviour. A professional will be able to spot whether you are accidently rewarding your dog's attention seeking too.

If your dog shows signs of stress, anxiety, or aggression, or you’re unsure of possible underlying influences in their behaviour, a professional will be able to assess their behaviour and help you tackle the underlying emotions and motivations, not just the surface level behaviour.

When attention-seeking is linked to other issues like separation anxiety, having a professional work alongside you will help you to address all the contributing issues and this will lead to better progress.

If your dog’s attention-seeking behaviour is becoming a challenge, remember that change is possible with the right approach. By being consistent and rewarding calm, appropriate behaviours, you can help your dog feel more relaxed without constant demands.

If you're not sure where to start or need support tailored to your dog's specific needs, we’re here to help. Get in touch to find out more about our force-free training services.